With All Due Respect

GREY FACEMASKS, REALLY? WTF’s NEXT?

2009-12-21T21:55:00.000-08:00

LAZY GOOD FOR NOTHIN’ BLOGERS!

2009-12-14T15:10:00.000-08:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT

If you’re gonna write a blog, get off your butt & write that frickin' blog! People are counting on you to say stupid things to make them laugh! I mean how hard is it? Anybody can write this stuff! Just because there’s a Heavy Metal Task Force marathon on Sci Fi doesn’t mean you can sit around all day & do nothing! If I ever get my hand on one of these lazy good for nothings they’ll be sorry…I’m just sayin’

USE SOME BATHROOM ETIQUETTE!

2009-11-21T09:31:00.000-08:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT
The bathroom is for #1 & #2 ONLY! Not clearing your throat for 15minutes or telling me all about your day.
& who in their right mind stands right next to a guy at the urinal unless forced? Really!? You don’t know that rule? I’ve also noticed a developing trend where people sit right next to me on the stalls. Same rules apply here buddy! Every other! Isn’t this stuff common sense?
& for the love of Pete who is the flippin' Euro shedding EVERYWHERE?….I’m just sayin’

SELF CHECKOUT SELF FIST

2009-11-10T19:23:00.000-08:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT...how smart does someone need to be to operate the self checkout isle at the grocery store? Seriously! If you don’t know how to read then you need to use the cashier line. It’s ok, they’re put there to help…& they get paid!

Hey, it’s really not any faster to sit there & stare at the pretty lights while you guess at which button to push. That's why they make casinos you tool. PLEASE, if it’s busy & you have more than 15 items, then you need to go to the regular line for assistance. One of these times you’re gonna piss off the wrong soccer mom or blog writer.
Lately I’ve also noticed a new trend: Utilizing the self checkout with a cart FULL of fresh produce. What is this!? You gotta be the dumbest SOB on the planet to think that’s ok.….I’m just sayin’

THIS RELATIONSHIP TAINT GONNA WORK

2009-11-03T17:48:00.000-08:00

NEW FEATURE THE “ZERO RESPECT” BLOG:
WITH ZERO RESPECT if you have a woman that isn’t crazy, like the rest of them, keep it in your pants dumb fuck! It’s simple math! What’s with people these days? Cheating & divorce are no big deal now? People are just fucking lazy is all! It used to be if you had problems you worked on it. If things didn’t work even after that then you can get a divorce. There’s just no accountability for someone’s quick, stupid, irrational decisions these days.
New rule #1:
If you cheat you get you’re junk removed for the guys & a cork for the ladies…& for those dirty girls you get two corks (Check the spelling all you blondes out there)! Sorry it’s nothin’ but ear fuckin’ for you, from now on.
New Rule #2:
If you’re fucking stupid enough to cheat in the same house you share with you’re significant other & hypothetically the significant other walks in on the deed only to see your ugly bitch’s taint crawling up on your bent spike, then it’s the death penalty for you. Or maybe banishment to the DMV, same thing I guess. We don’t need dip shits like you reproducing. Sorry Eric….I mean imaginary guy. No one should have to live with that image for the rest of their life.
Just so we’re clear eatin’ IS cheatin’, touching is not acceptable (even if she just got them), kissing requires an explanation (even without tongue). Pretty clear cut stuff. If you need to see something new then go to the strip club. It’s a magical place where you can see smokin’ hot chicks & they’ll even dance on your shit for a lot less then a divorce. Do you have any idea how many lap dances you can get with $2000!? Best of all this is socially acceptable, even to most chicks. Damn people are stupid….I’m just sayin’

NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN = NEW LOW FOR FILMMAKING

2009-10-29T11:29:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT No Country for Old Men is a shit movie! It was severely overhyped which was the only reason it did as well as it did! I have no idea why anybody would feel this is anything but an average movie? I mean the main character dies & there’s no build-up, no discussion with the bad guy, they don’t even show him die! It just happens & it’s done with! WTF!?
The only reason I even care is that I bought the movie without even seeing it. I figured all these critics couldn’t be wrong. I mean it’s their job to watch movies & let the rest of us know which ones are good. Where’s my fuckin’ check? !
It won Best Motion Picture of the Year in 2007! Not that any of the nominees were great but they were way better than that cinematic turd! This has me convinced that there’s no official committee voting on this stuff. They’re just showing movies to retarded chimpanzees & whatever screen they throw feces at that film gets a trophy.
If you liked that movie I want you to leave my blog immediately, go watch Brokeback Mountain 15 times, & say 37 Holy fuck’s I’m an idiot…I’m just sayin’

CHER NEEDS TO DIE ALREADY!

2009-10-26T20:13:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT ohhhh Cher how I hate you let me count the ways: I hate your face, I hate you’re your hair, I hate your music, I hate your movies, I hate that you’re 187 years old & continue to add plastic to your face. How are you even alive? You’re like the 6 Billion dollar dinosaur for god’s sake! Have I mentioned that you sound like Snuffleupagus when you talk & sing? Look, everybody knows why Sunny hit that tree. It’s because you were on the phone with him & he just couldn’t take it anymore. If "I Could Turn Back Time” I’d go back to 1870 & shoot the donkey & pig that conceived you...I’m just sayin’

20% MY ASS!

2009-10-26T19:53:00.001-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT wtf happened to a 15% TIP? Seems like we were at 10% forever & slowly we move up to 15%. Fine, fine, I can deal with that, but that was a week ago for fuck’s sake! How is it already time for another jump!? Fuck that! I’m not giving a 20% tip unless you earn it. Look, if I roll into Grease Corner at 2:00am & Flo is serving me runny eggs with a god damn Pall Mall dangles from her lips, the hell if I’m giving 20%. I don’t care how cheap the bill is! Comb your hair, cover up that thong, & lose the cherry red lipstick. Then maybe we’ll talk. However, if the cute girl at my favorite BBQ joint talks sports & scores us free soda that’s a different story...I’m just sayin’
Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-qV9wVGb38

YOU’RE OLD, YOU GET TO TAKE A TEST

2009-10-26T19:12:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT anyone over 60 years old should be required by law to retake a driving test. This is ridiculous! How many times do I need to get cut-off & nearly killed before someone does something? Hell, now that I think about it EVERYONE should be required to retake the driving test! Some of these hillbilly dickheads that can’t remember to keep a job probably need a refresher worse than old people. I mean when did it become OK to turn across two lanes at an intersection? Or ride the left lane on the highway? It’s not like the rules changed! My resolution is you take a test every ten years until you’re 56. Then it’s every 5. Plus it $10 ever time. Think of the money it would drum-up & the retards it would keep off the road…I’m just sayin’

Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xi3FHXVvoKw

HEY STAR JONES, NO MORE SHOPPING AT THE BABY GAP!

2009-10-26T18:43:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT all fat chicks have lost their tight clothes privileges! This has gotten way out of hand! I don’t care if you’re fat, chubby, chunky, overweight, have a belly, gut, muffin top, gunt, cankles, or just love handles put the spandex down! Nobody needs to see your hail damaged, cottage cheese ass! Go back to your trailer, eat a salad, & take a walk for fuck’s sake….I’m just sayin’

MUSTARD, WORST CONDIMENT EVER!

2009-10-26T18:34:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT mustard plain sucks! Looks like shit, tastes like shit, must be shit! How anybody eats that garbage is beyond me……I’m just sayin’

LOU, IF YOU’RE GONNA SUCK, AT LEAST TAKE OUT THE DENTURES!

2009-10-26T18:14:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT Lou Holtz is a shitty commentator at best! Just because he was the voice of Sylvester the cat from Looney Tunes DOES NOT make him qualified to be on TV. It’s gotten to the point that I have to turn off my favorite channel when he’s on. Who does this clown have naked pictures of? Have they never heard of a sports writer ..oh wait I forgot they have to invent waterproof paper first. How much are they paying to have the set moped up every day? I swear I saw Stewart Scott wearing a rain poncho the other day…I’m just sayin’

CHEAP TRICK SUCKS!

2009-10-26T17:53:00.000-07:00

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT Cheep Trick may be the worst band ever! If I have to hear “I want youuuuu to want me” or The god damn Dream Police one more fucking time I’m gonna kill myself! All their songs sound the same! & what’s with their guitarist & his retard hat? Looks like he won it at the carnival & just ripped the propeller off…I’m just sayin”